• Family

    I know i dont blog on personal things often and some would say when i do im not serious.

    Here are some of my relatives. Not to sure if you could pick me out.

  • Strength

    I’m stronger than you’ll ever be

    Because, to endure and have your sanity, to make it so long, a clearly defined character, rock hard in its clarity

    I am strength
    hidden in the hot exhale of your breath
    only seen in the cold void
    when there is nothing left

                                       ©️ Jacob Pickard. 2025.

  • Look Into my Eyes

    Yup. Not at my prime yet, just still a little naive. Senior High school picture ~1992. Very supple, stoned often, punk not glam metal but I was forced to comb out my long flowing locks. I was 18, so yes legal. 😉

  • Absolute Favorite Song, Group, or type of music?

    Okay people out there in WP land this is a difficult question and one that is very hard to answer.

       It gets worse if you have diverse musical genres you enjoy and listening moods that you mold the music around your feelings or state at the time.

            Personaly; punk, hardcore, metal, & rock have been my main as well as many of the sub-genera’s of them all. Dark wave, industrial, blues, Ambient, folk, Folk Nordic metal, old country and bluegrass. I also like classical, early rap, more jazzy hip-hop/trip-hop or political (here’s looking at you Public Enemy) rap. I’ve never much been into pop, but PJ Harvey, Lady Gaga & Billie Elish i have a soft spot for because of their voice, they speak their truth’s, and the dark feminine nature they exude (Check out Chelsea Wolf). Im not a swifty but I like that she speaks out her politics and stands her ground.

    So I im going to try to answer one of the questions I asked above and of course it is not 100%, but my favorite band(s) of all time goes to CLUTCH. Every song is a story, the lyrics build it into a saga, and the music a foundation for a mythology.

    I first saw them in my brother’s basement in Madison, WI. Everytime I see them it’s like meeting up with an old friend.

    Released 1991

    Released 1995

    Released 1998

    Released 2013

    Released 2022

    Clutch Clutch Album Cover 1995

        Honorable mentions go to Carcass, The Dead Boys, Mastodon, Gwar, Godflesh, Boy Sets Fire, Paradise Lost, Subhumans, Grinch (west coast progressive hardcore), Bahaus, Circle Jerks, Black Flag, Amy Winehouse, The Cure, Beethoven, Curve, Public Enemy, Anthrax, Conflict, Brian Eno, Front Line Assembly, Skinny Puppy, Chelsea Wolf, Suldusk, Swallow the Sun, Red Fang, Melvins, My Bloody Valentine, Coil, etc…etc…etc…etc.

    Released 1986

    Released 1992

    Released 2019

    Released 2006

    Released 1991

    Released 1977


    So what do ally’all like? Can you answer this question?


  • Until Nothing Remains

    Let them fall from your lips on the ground
    And consume you in flames with your crown
    You can add up your ill-gotten gains
    And keep count till nothing remains



    Rise ye wolves up above the sound
    Through the choir of sheep as they drown
    Raise the banner of the proud and untamed
    Burn the kingdom down… until nothing remains

    Death throe dance pul in quite the crowd
    Cheering throngs of the scorned still unbowed
    The system’s dead and we spit on the grave
    Let it fucking rot… until nothing remains

    You hide in a sickness that leaves you unbowed
    Scorched earth policy friendships allow
    For your dreams and their failings to mount
    An assault on continous lies

    Let them fall from your lips on the ground
    And consume you in flames with your crown
    You can add up your ill-gotten gains
    And keep count till nothing remains

    When ashes remain
    Burn… ’til the truth is out
    Burn… down to hallowed ground
    Burn… and rebuild again
    Burn. Burn. Until nothing remains


    Boy Sets Fire

    Written by: Joshua Latshaw, Nathan Gray, Robert Ehrenbrand, Charles W Istvan, Christopher Rakus
    Album: While a Nation Sleeps
    Released: 2013

  • incest wealth, bloated & depraved, voyeur of abomination

    History teaches us a lesson about what the majority of the insanely rich and powerful become, how their brains devolve into psychosis, those that exist “As Above”; viewing the rest of us as meat bound chattle, flesh to be exploited, blood to be guzzled, to kill us with impunity, injure us, as if swallowing and bathing in the blood of virgins & the young can unwrinkle your skin or stop the ends of your DNA strands unraveling. The ultra-wealthy the powerful (abomination), these people use your labor, use disease, abort your health from the pollution they dump in your air, your water to make profit, use everthing to enrich themselves futher and steal your power, your health, & your confidence. The supposed miracle of laize-faire capitalism birthed into bloody flesh ripping cannibalism, disembowling itself, hedging itself, gorging itself on it’s own innards, betting on failure, only to leave shit, piss, bile, and gnashed bone.

          Make you small, weak, prey.


    Keep Rotting in the Free World

    Consumer or consumed, your life is cheap
    Economic salvation in sweatshops returned from the east,

    Despair the only quality of strife,

    A reason for existence if you can afford the price,            

    If your price is right


         250 years of the USA and it has birthed another generation of Nero’s, Bathory’s, D’sade’s, Caligula’s; your Maxwell’s, Diddy’s, Epsteins, Trumps, Fergusons, intelligence agencies…..we have called them the wealthy, rich, celebrities, CEO’s, intellectuals, left right, liberal conservative.

       Ghouls who survive on the cannabilism of their fellow human beings. Spheres of power,  as a super predator, you are the prey. They rape, commit genocide, murder, pollute and without question prove that wealth & power twist their humanity into abomination. Each inch given by us, the unwashed riff-raff, brings humanity a few feet closer to speciecide. The instable hunger of the abomination from insane levels of concentrated wealth and it’s self-serving power.

        Multiple spheres of power coalesce, using other’s for the physical manifestation of their cruelty. It’s not enough to raise the prices of medication, or dump PCB’s in the water, force hunger, or steal your labor; they need to exert that power on living targets they can touch; deflowerimg by the domination of the powerless, those invisible. Rape is the goal, seeing the cruelty they created by their own hands, yielding that power must be seen physically and mentally on a victim, to enforce the fact that they beleive themselves “On High” over the rest of us who do not exist in their incestual nucleus of spheres; to manifest it, on a small scale for selfish gratification. The sweet suffering of the helpless; A sacrifice to their gluttonous god they worship: Themselves!

  • High Wire Escape Artist

    I will never believe them (lies)
    I’m sick of the weakness that controls me
    Now that I’ve fallen, I will not repent



    Bleed out all empathy
    This vessel has no spirit left to hold on
    To lies I’ve lived in full

    How long can I hold tight
    With every movement
    Tension binds and denies
    My true nature

    The balance has shifted
    Warped sick and twisted
    Grabbing at angels when I fall
    Because I am more than this idol
    Endless recital
    For all my demons to applaud
    I am free

    Hide myself from it all
    While every fear is
    Screaming night into dawn
    Until I find

    The balance has shifted
    Warped sick and twisted
    Grabbing at angels when I fall
    Because I am more than this idol
    Endless recital
    For all my demons to applaud
    I am free

    Do I have to believe them? (Lies)
    In order to attain fulfillment
    I have to succumb to (lies)
    All my inner fears that tear at me
    I will never believe them (lies)
    I’m sick of the weakness that controls me
    Now that I’ve fallen, I will not repent

    The balance has shifted
    Warped sick and twisted
    Grabbing at angels when I fall
    Because I am more than this idol
    Endless recital
    For all my demons to applaud
    I am free

    Boy Sets Fire Written by: Joshua Latshaw, Nathan Gray, Robert Avery, Matthew Krupanski, Charles Istvan Album: Tomorrow Come Today Released: 2003

  • What do I stand for or was I born against?

    What do I stand for or was I born against?

    Credit to the prompt goes to https://justrojie.com


    How do you actually define this?

       When you stand for something, that means you should be automatically against the binary inverse, unfortunately pride, arrogance, aggrieved victimhood, situational ethics (tribalism), can & will take these parts of character, twist them into unrecognizable mutants, and destroy those things once held dear into phantoms and outright frauds.

    Sign Language 7″ compilation, Allied Recordings, 1992. https://www.discogs.com/release/2586751-Various-Sign-Language

       The above are three human conditions, I stand against. I have stood against them for basically my entire life. They are reflected in most of my actions, down to where i shop (I keep it small, local or regional as possible), who I support politicaly, and personal interactions with others. I view all people as equal at birth and all should have the same opportunities.

      I question everything, even my personal philosophy, my left leaning politics, my character, my actions, what I beleive since I was young. Growing up in conflict has conditioned me into a powerful detachment, yet I am endlessly passionate when it comes to my beliefs, that “being rational”, that empathy & compassion in the end will make the case that these base human needs will win out and are more important than rage, bigotry, hate, apathy, & indifference.


    “Those who stand for nothing fall for anything.”

    Alexander Hamilton


      No doubt I am a fool; but at the end of the day, looking into the mirror, it’s far more important that I expressed my character honorably and that I stand my ground.


    ©️ Jacob Pickard.2026.

  • Putting things in Perspective

    Whenever life gets you down, Mrs Brown
    And things seem hard or tough
    And people are stupid, obnoxious or daft
    And you feel that you’ve had quite enough


    Absurdum for our absurd cruel world.


    So remember when you’re feeling very small and insecure
    How amazingly unlikely is your birth
    And pray that there’s intelligent life somewhere up in space
    ‘Cause there’s bugger all down here on earth

  • 100%

    Bathing in your arrogance, dining will ensue
    God made me a cannibal to fix problems like you



    I heard this song after Trump was elected the second time. All I can say it’s fitting for those who complained the first round about the corrupt grifting Fool King, but quickly became apathetic & drowned in the temple of self again, when Biden was elected. I blame those who didn’t vote, the self-gelding of the left, the democrats cutting off their balls, and apathetic people for this second round of Trump. Republicans & MAGA were known quantities, they didn’t lie about who and what they would do. The right has built a 50 year infrastructure to take over the nation fueled by billionaires, not a conspiracy, reality.


    Trust my dog
    Shut your eyes (you’re dead)

    Televised mass poison spitting at the screen
    Keep the masses deluded with fabricated dreams
    Powdered God in a bag from the Vatican
    I want you to fuck off as hard as you can

    Relax
    God is in control
    Watch the dot
    Take your meds
    Obey my demands
    Trust my dog
    Time for surgery
    Relax
    God is in control
    Watch the dot
    Take your meds
    Obey my demands
    Trust my dog
    Shut your eyes (you’re dead)

    Heaven has burst open, now it’s raining bones
    The chaos will erode you, breeding little clones
    Born of a fallen rib from the monkey’s womb
    Overcooked by cathode rays, evolved to consume

    100%
    100%
    100%
    100% (fucked)

    (Relax, God is in control)
    (Watch the dot, take your meds)
    (Obey my demands, trust my dog)
    (Time for surgery, relax)

    Eating from the butcher’s slab, becoming what they meet
    Restrained and roasted while they gorge, strapped into the seat
    Bathing in your arrogance, dining will ensue
    God made me a cannibal to fix problems like you

    Relax
    (God is in control)
    (Watch the dot, take your meds)
    (Obey my demands, trust my dog)
    100%
    (Relax, God is in control)
    (Watch the dot, take your meds)
    (Obey my demands, trust my dog)
    100%

    Last time was the last time
    This time you’re 100%
    Last time was the last time
    This time you’re 100%
    Last time was the last time
    This time you’re 100%
    Last time was the last time
    This time you’re 100%
    Fucked

    Written by: Learmont Karl Thomas
    Album: Krankhaus
    Released: 2006


  • Holy Fuck! I’m famous 😂


        I had no Idea that any of the bands i was in back in the day were even relevant, but I guess people like classical music from the mid-90’s. Although its missing i was one of the founding members of the band “Downer”, but i never played out with them.

        Emo-punk back then was a completely different animal then what it has morphed into, which is more of a semi-goth fashion ascetic, rather than a mish-mash of rock, punk, hardcore, metal, even folk influences music type it was. Emo had nothing to do with look or style, it what was what’s inside that counted. Speaking up, baring your soul regardless of reaction of the audience.  But hey! I was just a bass player.

    Don’t get me started on what is considered to be “Goth” nowadays, it’s all become a fashion lifestyle were the music it aborted from it and is mostly just a side note. It’s a fact Bela Legosi is dead and the Sisters of Mercy didn’t include Sousxie and her Banshees. 😉

    I think it was Hot Topic’s fault. Back in my day you had to go to a pet store to get a good chain collar to wear or mail order spikes for your black leather biker jacket. Damn kids! Whom are now in their 30’s. Ageing, is and always will be, the best self-own on those younger than yourself who are making fun of you for being older.


    Chaste – Tounge in Cheek




    End of Witacre was the best of the three bands I was in ~1997. Of course ego’s got in the way of the one band i was in that had the talent and drive to make it, even if a little in the alt-music sphere. Remember this is way before MySpace, the internet music revolution, etc… recordings and making it to larger audiences back in the olden days was a lot more difficult than today because everything was analog and hardcopy.

        Anyway, I stood my ground and defended my longtime band mate and friend Cory and decided that if they were going to kick him out, then I wouldn’t be part of the band either. Thus, break-up. I still stand by that decision. Loyalty, honor & character mean a lot to me. In the beginning of 1998 I moved back home to my parents house, played lots of starcraft, Diablo and went back to school concentrating on the natural sciences.

    ©️ Jacob Pickard. 2026.

  • Lilli-Vanilli

    Teaching a dog how to dog?

    It’s an interesting journey and learning experience. Lilli is the 3rd rescue. She was bred to breed, and not to dog or even puppy. She is learning and everyday becomes more confident and stronger.

    The corn toy probably the first toy she has had ever. She watches, waits, measures me and my actions at all times. I understand. Actions are more powerful than words, a reality i understand.

    Building trust takes time and affection. With dogs its not words its actions that matter (okay and good treats :))

    I call her Lilli-girl, but for some reason Lilli-Vanilli caught my brain first, but it’s about her, finding her a forever home.

  • WuckFinter 2026 Feb. 22

    Wuckfinter

    Rays Liquors Wauwatosa, WI (MKE area)

    Put Cheese & Beer, and Music in a parking lot on a 25 degree day and we shall come.

    Raclette cheese 🧀! Mmmmmm…
  • May Haiku

    Things have changed.

    Time vigor pride beaten down by the club of life.
    Resurrection?
    Not while we’re alive.

               ©️ Jacob Pickard. 2025. Written ~ 2010.

  • Houseplant Jungle

    Crotan on the right ive had at least 26 years, sword, then a huge Monstera, Money Plant, Australian Fern and I forgot the species on the farm left.
    To the right a species of Prickly Pear, then two other cacti i forget the species of. The one on the left has a effed up growth pattern from years of slow growth, it’s a bit phallic.
    Madagascar Palm at least 10 years old. Transplanting hurts, a lot.

    FYI – I have a BS in Ecology. I took a lot of botany invertebrate zoology, mycology, loved studying algae, lots of marine as well and other focuses, because Ecology is multidisciplinary in nature. It’s really a deep-dive into system dynamics.

       Always loved house plants before that though, hence a portion of my plant army.

  • Enlightened Journaling Prompt #1

    Okay ive never done this before but here we go:


    “What’s a stupid thing you do or say, and you know it’s dumb, that slightly annoy’s other people, but you do it anyway because you think it’s funny and you don’t care it annoy’s others?”

  • Crush

    Having a crush?

    Best feeling a person can have.

    Full of new experiences

    Heat, tounge, lips, hands……fingers…

    The mental spike just as intense if it’s virtual or face-to-face.

  • Love

    How it is expressed is important.

    How it is not expressed is also important.

    Understand that love is conditional, it can be unconditional, but that is rare.

  • Emoji Haiku for Social Media comments

    Blue dot……..🔵…..
    ….Affirm my existence…🤔…
    Yes! Blue dot..🔵…..
    Fuck!….😤….judgment?!!

    ©️ Jacob Pickard. 2025.

  • Emoji Haiku for the Bad Apple

    Apple 🍎 crisp?

    Soft, mealy 🤮

    Fuck 🖕that Apple

       ©️  Jacob Pickard. 2025.

  • EROHERETIC – VOLUME 🔞

    Dirty & filthy. Are you sure you want to read this?

    VOLUME

  • Bad Bunny – Super Bowl Halftime Show

    Fuck! Awesome.

    Never heard him until today but he took the negative bullshit and raised it 100. No cowering, no mercy back.

    I respect that he said what needed to be said. Pushed back without pulling punches.

  • American Idiot

    Green Day had this right back in the day. Still correct as it was then as is now.

  • Phe Phi Pho Num

    Lunch today. I think it’s the best Pho in Milwaukee. Always get the large and had some chopped pork belly on the side with a hot pepper sauce. 

               Phongsavan Market Place

    https://maps.app.goo.g/ida35ejzZ5kCDZq79

  • What disco did to Europe?

    Im well aware of what Disco did to the USA, that it changed the Beegee’s from a rock band to a disco staple, giving us Saturday Night fever and pee yellow polyester leisure suits.

    But ive never seen this…..

  • White Whale

    I have no white whale to consume my soul, I am that white whale. Born a beast a monster: failures, oppression, hurt, murder, rape, death, genocide, femicide, and even your internal misery. I am your enemy i am your monster.

    qualities you possess, your biological virtuous signaling superiority; a kingdom built of rage safe space for authority
    victimhood aggreivment gives you power, self righteous-justification, superior unquestioned objectification

           of me, the white whale

    pluck out my eyes, spear my flesh, spill my blood, sickle my fat, bind my girth, blind me with your spit, hell hath no fury like your scorn upon me, i am your monster, your beast, a sacrifice for the goddess your ruler above, penetrate me, rape me, a mangled object your conquest that was born guilty

    Yes be Ahab, understand
    While lashed on your shattered ship
    Sinking into the ocean abyss

    ”Damning yourself was a choice,  you created your end by decision, your agency was your own.”


    “Never understanding the nature of revenge while you let me consume your soul, do you understand you never were free, as long as all your thoughts were always centered on me.”

    I, the white whale swims free, I will forever, be the last thing your living eyes ever shall see


    ©️ Jacob Pickard. 2025.

  • Isolation

    Charcoal & Pencil

  • Social Media, Being A Writer & Bonding

           So back in 2015 I stopped using Facebook and Social media all together, i did have a My Space before that. In-between I dabled in Reddit, twitter, and Instagram all of which in my point of view are cesspools. Not that I’m a saint, but I detest those who catfish & scam, trolls, asshole partisians, virtue superiority signaling, maga, aggreivment gender supremacist, trauma grifters, and the general way people treat eachother with disrespect and make instant judgements on your life and character. Also, the stalkers, who go after you, plenty of those ass hats.

         I orginally quit social media in 2015 for two reasons, with my friends it felt hallow and fake why not just talk, the second was how MAGA used it with Cambridge Anylitica to get Trump elected, blatant manipulation and FaceBook was cool with it: that was to me grounds to tell FB to fuck off. I haven’t been back since, nor Amazon for that matter. I’ve always made decsions based on my politics and where I spend my money and what platform I allow to advertise to me i take important. One of the reasons I left Substack, because it’s owned by a libertarian tech bro. After the Charlie kirk assination they let MAGA gaslight and make death threats for at least a week. I have no doubt just like Zuckerberg & X, soon as a writer or blogger they will write into the terms that your work, copyright, or IP will no longer be protected.                                      

    The thing that disappoints me the most about social media is relationships with other people, or the superficiality of them. I am a person who always is trying to “bond”. I’ve found that the vast majority of people you think you are bonding with are not treating the experience of learning about eachother the same way you would physically, as in face to face. It’s as if the wired has a “buffer” that keeps these bonds that you build from ever becoming reality. I can’t imagine how it is to date with online apps, it must be like going through a menu at a 24 hour greek restaurant at 3am with a bunch of other drunk people.

      In December of 2024, I went back in and to blueskye trying to push back against X like many X’ers, then came WordPress for my writing, then I left both for Substack in may of 2025 (also, partly because a WordPress writer was actively gaslighting me). I went to SS just when the notes part (the social media part) of SS came online. Though, I met a lot of cool people on Blueskye & Substack many who had helped me through some of the toughest emotionaly horrible months of my life, there has been only one that I have a meaningfull relationship with that I have from all of it.

         The cruelty I faced for coming out regarding my assaults was sometimes overwhelming. The anger and spite directed at me for speaking out just to be heard, the cruelty, the hate, the rage. I finally had enough of it on SS too, like I had on Blueskye. Living with an assault considered taboo, I have no idea what I was thinking trying to find answers on social media sites. I was desperate just to find some grace in a world that views you as a villian at birth, even though you were not the villian, and the experience goes against the narrative.

      Now, I plan on staying on WordPress. The last year has been an education for me. Social media is not for some people, I am one of them.

           I’m a writer, on the darker side, and a terrible artist, but what I show you and what you read is genuine, it’s from my heart and mind. The majority of the art or images I take myself.

         I give you me and I ask nothing from you in return.

    ©️ Jacob Pickard. 2026.

       

  • The next EROHERETIC

    The next one is going to be extra dirty and kinky…….I asked Jake if it was too soon? Well..
  • How to create a quote

    Saw lot’s of quotes of wisdom when I was on SS; this is the best i could do. 🤷‍♂️
  • We will still kill you!

    https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=uknvYMHCtrg&si=bq_l6R6WfW5pAArt

    Olbermann has been spot on for years and takes no prisoners.

    Just so you know Democrats won’t help you, you need to do it yourself.

    This is spot on about what we are facing.

  • In the spirit of total resistance

    This was a compilation punk 7″ from the early 90’s to support the Mowhawk native American Resistance against the Mexican government. This is a lesson on what needs to happen in the United States.

    To resist is to change yourself.

    You must become a warrior.

    We out-number the villians in this world.

    There is NO room for apathy.

    Only TOTAL resistance.

  • Doxx ICE: They are the villians

    I guess in MN/St. Paul, ICE agents are finally getting databased, their lives as non-agents being exposed.

       This is exactly what needs to be done to these thugs that murder and kill behined masks. Disappear American citizens, destroy families, and murder in cold blood.

    This isn’t even political anymore, it’s matter of survival for you, family, friends, all of those who just want to live there lives and not live under a dictatorship run by child rapists, grifters, and corporate criminals.

    You hold one of the most powerful tools in your hand.      Your smart phone is POWER.