Category: music

  • BSKY to WP-JP to SS back to WP-JP journeyย  Part 2: Electric Boogaloo

    When did you begin your WordPress journey, and how do you manage it day by day?

    Thank you Deepika, for the prompt!
    Feel free to use any prompts for May 2026 

    From https://justrojie.com

    Part I: ONE


    Medication change November 2024

    I had a medication change from a Zoloft generic to a new medication on November of 2024, which works much differently than the serotonin based zoloft.  Changing not only made me susceptible to seasonal affective disorder, but I began to suffer from depression, with Trump winning, my overall mental health took a hit.

    Blueskye: Ecoheretic – December 2024

         I was not prepared for social media and how people are protected from face-to-face interactions. Because of my medication change i was not prepared emotionaly, I’ve always had little to no armor, and I am very sensative.

       I went back on with the intention to network with others to resist. Well, it was a joke. The left is just a shadow of what it was. Different factions segregate themselves from eachother. Feminists vs. Labor, Progressives vs. Democrats, Identity politics vs. Moderate dems, etc… the entire left at war with itself. Walled into their areas of group think. The hatred i felt directed at me for being a white male, as if I had the choice of how I was born, was intense. The hatred I felt for coming out about my sa’s was intense. One poster literally said male assault victims didn’t matter, like it was like saying “all lives matter”. On the right i wasn’t even a man,  but a pathetic simp that should be killed, well, left & right that feeling of not belonging to anyone or anything intensified.

       This is the fact, I am one man, I am not “all men”, and I am sick of being guilted for the actions of other men and being assaulted does not make me less of a man. Men can have an inner misandrist, it’s real. Being granted victim status however, an adult male is not given it by soceity in fact no one wants to talk about it or deal with it, its taboo. Men have to take it if they want to heal. I had yet to take my victim status, and I needed permission to do it.

      So, like any other human, I made myself small after that, cleared my history twice, started publishing some poetry, I couldn’t get it all on my posts, so I researched website platforms and WP was politicaly one of the best, as in it doesnt feed the tech bro’s.

    Fate? The first person I connected with on blsky was a misandrist lesbian goethe goth. She needed help and I did help. I don’t think she needed all of it, but whatever happened it got me rediscovering myself & help crack my suppressed memories. She has my eternal thanks.

    WP-JP: Echoheretic – March of 2025

    At first it started out okay, I would publish on WP and then put the link on Blueskye. I did this till about April, and then left Blueskye, I was done with the instant judgement of my character, things said taken out of context, being blocked, stalked, harassed.

    For most of April & May I enjoyed WP-JP. I learned that i liked writing erotica, found out i was good at it. Then another writer started to gaslight me. At first it was uplifting that she would react to my work, but that only lasted so long, everything changed when I came out about my sa’s. Ill just say her initials were DD, and her gaslighting towards me was based on ideology. So I decided to leave for Substack, I was sick of being mistreated.

    Substack: Alien Relay 3.0/Eroheretic – May of 2025

    Things got better, and then they got worse.

    When i moved over to SS the notes part of it just started. In fact it was okay at first, but at the start of 2025 SS was getting a lot of press and getting more popular.

    At this time I was emotionaly wrecked, my identity as a white male lefty with strong femenist ideals was on the way to being destroyed, questioning my own masculinity and worth, my confidence destroyed, the moral superiority of the left disgusted me after being on the receiving end. In fact there were times that I felt like it was my fault for my assaults, like I was the one who made them do it. I would literally cry everyday on my way to work, and the way home. It was the only place I could let it out without an audience. That rage i was suppressing, that I didn’t want to let out, but it wanted to be let out, was working its way out. And little at a time “all woman” would pass my mind.

      Know this, a person that breaks the narrative is a threat.


      

  • BSKY to WP-JP to SS back to WP-JP journey: Part 1

    When did you begin your WordPress journey, and how do you manage it day by day?

    Thank you Deepika, for the prompt!
    Feel free to use any prompts for May 2026 

    From https://justrojie.com


    I dont do writing prompts often. This is a long memoir, because my journey didn’t just start with me waking up and deciding to put my work online. It was evolution and adaptation that has led me here.

    I think what’s more interesting is why i decided to end up using WP-JP as my chosen platform.

    I literally have miles of written content & underground published essays, fiction, poetry, prose, illustration, water color painting, activism,  political opinion editorials, zines, been in punk bands, music, miles of creation behined me over the long years. The majority in hardcopy, much of it now lost.

    I’ve been writing in some capacity most of my life. I normally don’t write biographical peices, because as a fiction and prose writer my experiences are written in as code: I use them indirectly, I enjoy it, its fulfilling to world and character build, and the “act-of-writing” also acts as therapy.

    I was Fully active writing until about 2002. After 2000 my focus went to education, I got a BS in Ecology, spending a few summers doing Marine Ecology based on islands both in the north Pacific and north Atlantic.

    Me at a hotel drinkng retreat I set up in New Hampshire in the summer of 1999 when I spent 4 months doing Marine Ecology and working on Appledore Island off the coast of New Hampshire.

    In Wisconsin i did lot’s of invasive species work, herbariums for the Mueseum, urban forestry surveys, worked in a vineyard, etc…but Ecology jobs were in short Supply and I needed insurance. So I became a Field Chemist cleaning up Hazardous Waste. I traveled the midwest, plains states, and the south for about 2ish years, untill i got a Biotech job. I liked the travel, but my mind was on not getting poisoned, melted by acids and bases, or blowing up.

    2010-2011: Alien Relay 2.0 an online political blog in the wake of the Wisconsin Uprising after the Republicans killed public unions.

    In 2012: My writers block and a loss-of-self began…………Summer of 2019: I had a trauma reaction from my relationship that expressed itself in a long hypersexual period & delibating anxiety & dissociation, this unhealthy awakening would lead to something even more traumatic. I Dabled in hook-up apps, reddit, kik, AFF, etc….was catfished, scammed, grifted on…I failed in spectacular fashion trying to hook-up…I learned these things were not for me.ย  You needed to be hard, cynical, and couldn’t trust anything.ย  Funny thing at this time, I thought non-binary meant people who didn’t use dating apps. ๐Ÿ˜… That’s either really cute or appallingly ignorant, I like to think a little of both.

    December 2019: Covid fears start worldwide as China is hit hard in Chengdu.

    January 2020: At the biotech firm we got a majority of are synthetic DNA bases from Chengdu, we started masking and gloving up in the material handling/hazardous waste department I ran. I often worked by myself for weeks, while coworkers were out due to early social isolation recommendations.

    April 2020: Covid hits New York; by then i fully surpressed my needs. The biotech firm i worked for created Nucleotides, which were needed for the first few rounds of the MRNA vaccines, where i worked was one of the few places that made it and mostly for research before Covid. My Zoloft generic dose was doubled by my psychiatrist, i also started to become a serotonin zombie, increasing my already strong dissociation and suppressing my sexual needs. We would get a year’s worth of material in 3 weeks! Needless to say from the start of 2020 till when I was downsized/fired in August of 2022 (the corporation execs needed more ponies for their children). I was busy nonstop from the second I walked into work to the second I left work. I was 120% exhausted. However I am proud of the work i did, I helped save untold numbers of people’s lives by working with purpose, regardless of recognition I wear my work in that period as a badge of honor.

    November 2023: On a November in 2023 on a Thursday i was locked out of the house, then I was sexually assaulted twice by two different woman in one night. I suppressed that trauma deep within me, telling nobody until January of 2025. Until this day, my immediate family does not know.

    November 2015: I left social media, Facebook, in 2015 after I learned how Zuckerberg/FB with Cambridge Analytica’s help, helped Trump win by data-mining and targeting people. Being politically active, that was enough for me to quite, I also felt SM as hallow. In December of 2024 after Trump won, my politically active-self stirred and I joined Blueskye to battle X. Fact: Many X’ers that either left SM earlier like I did or it was their first time became active on Blueskye.

    Holy Fuck! I was, we were, not prepared at all for what Social Media became!

      

  • Save Yourself – Boy Sets Fire

    Shut your mouth look around
    This motherfucker is burning down
    And nothingโ€™s gonna save us now


    ย ย  I’m cynical by watching the majority of the left become politicaly apathetic, self-deafeating, ignorant, complacent, arrogant, aggreived victimhood, isolated to their towers of self-absorption after Biden was elected gives me little hope for the future.

    As a politicaly active person on the left all my life, the betrayl doesn’t come from MAGA or Republicans, it comes from the left and Democrats, because it’s been castrating itself willingly over the last 20 years.



    So this is what you want
    Choices are made and given up
    I just cant comprehend the need to sit when you can stand
    The game is rigged, the money spent

    Shut your mouth look around
    This motherfucker is burning down
    And nothingโ€™s gonna save us now
    Get outโ€ฆ and save yourself

    Thereโ€™s only so much I can say
    tried so hard to help you find your way
    But every step a wasted breath of false hope and promises
    Thereโ€™s nothing to save, thereโ€™s nothing left

    Nothingโ€™s left of you today
    Save yourself or die away

    So this is what you want
    Your choice was made, youโ€™ve given up
    Iโ€™ll never comprehend the need to sit when you can stand
    Thereโ€™s nothing left, the money spent


    Writer(s): Nathan Gray, Joshua Latshaw, Robert Ehrenbrand, Charles W Istvan, Christopher Rakus album: “While A Nation Sleeps…” (2013)
    BoySetsFire – While A Nation Sleeps.

  • Border Line – Sharon Apple

    “Meet me and hit me
    Tiny and sticky candy
    Kiss and eating
    Are just the same things”


    ……………shiver down spine……………..


    https://youtu.be/KtH-ARmGM0M?si=kc3_MUdRTtFNBQeQ

    The borderline
    The borderline
    The borderline
    The borderline

    Red and roses
    Lips and breath
    Hair and dolls
    They’re look alike

    Smoke and mist
    Night and midnight
    The deep and hell
    They really get me

    Flip and fly
    Heal and feel
    Flower and poison
    Are on the brink

    The borderline
    The borderline
    The borderline
    The borderline

    Body and Jell-O
    Crack and jazz
    Arch and bridge
    They’re look alike

    Meet me and hit me
    Tiny and sticky candy
    Kiss and eating
    Are just the same things

    Free and fall
    And love and low
    Evil make you feel good
    Can’t help doing that

    The borderline
    The borderline
    The borderline
    The borderline


    The Borderlineโ€ is a song by character Sharon Apple and performed by Akino Arai. It is featured in the anime OVA series Macross Plus and its compilation movie.

  • The Price Was High – Drop Ninteens

    “I’m quiet as I’m kept and more or less concussed for years
    But I can’t shake your body
    So I shake mine instead when it’s time to percuss”


    This song exudes femenine desire and yearning, it has a great shoegazer ascetic to it and a smooth laid back danceable beat for non-dance music.



    The special way
    The hunt began and ended with London on my mind
    The nights from days
    And letters penned in earnest with heartstrings sent unsigned

    In a round about sway
    Not a word, not a sound
    All’s forgiven, anyway

    Haven’t even slept, so
    I’m quiet as I’m kept and more or less concussed for years
    But I can’t shake your body
    So I shake mine instead when it’s time to percuss

    In a round about sway
    Not a word, not a sound
    All’s forgiven, anyway

    Names escaped run amok with bottle caps for eyes
    The nights from days ferried east and ended with no one getting wise (when was this?)
    On the Champs-ร‰lysรฉes on no rest, you fluoresce
    All’s forgiven for forgotten men and women, more or less

    In a round about sway
    Not a word, not a sound
    All’s forgiven by the way
    Men and women, it’s time to percuss


    Written by: Motohiro Yasue, Paula Kelley, Steve Zimmerman, Greg Ackell, Peter Koeplin
    Album: Hard Light
    Released: 2023

  • Cacophony

    Cacophony Album Cover – Rudementary Peni release 1988

    A wall of sound, like a train into solid mountain granite

    A cacophonic quartet of smashing rhythm

    Surrounded by darkness and a halo of thin light.

    The bar, black walls, stale smoke and beer

    Illumination of execution by genocide, crucifixion for/of beliefs

    Murder, letting of blood

    Metamorphosis

    Material to ethereal, body to spirit

    Or some would call it glory, ascendancy of man to heaven

    Cyclical thunderous melody, droning and blooming into monotonous complexity

    Bombastic renewal of circles cycles, of intricate repetition.

    The eye of Isis, the death and rebirth of Osiris. The annual flooding of the Nile.

    Life is a system, the process of rearrangement of cyclical moving parts, like a wall of sound.



    Written around ~1995 after seeing the band Neurosis at Okayz Corral in Madison, WI. It was so loud I couldn’t hear correctly for an entire week.ย  ยฉJacob A Pickard.ย  2025.


  • 100%

    Bathing in your arrogance, dining will ensue
    God made me a cannibal to fix problems like you



    I heard this song after Trump was elected the second time. All I can say it’s fitting for those who complained the first round about the corrupt grifting Fool King, but quickly became apathetic & drowned in the temple of self again, when Biden was elected. I blame those who didn’t vote, the self-gelding of the left, the democrats cutting off their balls, and apathetic people for this second round of Trump. Republicans & MAGA were known quantities, they didn’t lie about who and what they would do. The right has built a 50 year infrastructure to take over the nation fueled by billionaires, not a conspiracy, reality.


    Trust my dog
    Shut your eyes (you’re dead)

    Televised mass poison spitting at the screen
    Keep the masses deluded with fabricated dreams
    Powdered God in a bag from the Vatican
    I want you to fuck off as hard as you can

    Relax
    God is in control
    Watch the dot
    Take your meds
    Obey my demands
    Trust my dog
    Time for surgery
    Relax
    God is in control
    Watch the dot
    Take your meds
    Obey my demands
    Trust my dog
    Shut your eyes (you’re dead)

    Heaven has burst open, now it’s raining bones
    The chaos will erode you, breeding little clones
    Born of a fallen rib from the monkey’s womb
    Overcooked by cathode rays, evolved to consume

    100%
    100%
    100%
    100% (fucked)

    (Relax, God is in control)
    (Watch the dot, take your meds)
    (Obey my demands, trust my dog)
    (Time for surgery, relax)

    Eating from the butcher’s slab, becoming what they meet
    Restrained and roasted while they gorge, strapped into the seat
    Bathing in your arrogance, dining will ensue
    God made me a cannibal to fix problems like you

    Relax
    (God is in control)
    (Watch the dot, take your meds)
    (Obey my demands, trust my dog)
    100%
    (Relax, God is in control)
    (Watch the dot, take your meds)
    (Obey my demands, trust my dog)
    100%

    Last time was the last time
    This time you’re 100%
    Last time was the last time
    This time you’re 100%
    Last time was the last time
    This time you’re 100%
    Last time was the last time
    This time you’re 100%
    Fucked

    Written by: Learmont Karl Thomas
    Album: Krankhaus
    Released: 2006


  • Holy Fuck! I’m famous ๐Ÿ˜‚


        I had no Idea that any of the bands i was in back in the day were even relevant, but I guess people like classical music from the mid-90’s. Although its missing i was one of the founding members of the band “Downer”, but i never played out with them.

        Emo-punk back then was a completely different animal then what it has morphed into, which is more of a semi-goth fashion ascetic, rather than a mish-mash of rock, punk, hardcore, metal, even folk influences music type it was. Emo had nothing to do with look or style, it what was what’s inside that counted. Speaking up, baring your soul regardless of reaction of the audience.  But hey! I was just a bass player.

    Don’t get me started on what is considered to be “Goth” nowadays, it’s all become a fashion lifestyle were the music it aborted from it and is mostly just a side note. It’s a fact Bela Legosi is dead and the Sisters of Mercy didn’t include Sousxie and her Banshees. ๐Ÿ˜‰

    I think it was Hot Topic’s fault. Back in my day you had to go to a pet store to get a good chain collar to wear or mail order spikes for your black leather biker jacket. Damn kids! Whom are now in their 30’s. Ageing, is and always will be, the best self-own on those younger than yourself who are making fun of you for being older.


    Chaste – Tounge in Cheek




    End of Witacre was the best of the three bands I was in ~1997. Of course ego’s got in the way of the one band i was in that had the talent and drive to make it, even if a little in the alt-music sphere. Remember this is way before MySpace, the internet music revolution, etc… recordings and making it to larger audiences back in the olden days was a lot more difficult than today because everything was analog and hardcopy.

        Anyway, I stood my ground and defended my longtime band mate and friend Cory and decided that if they were going to kick him out, then I wouldn’t be part of the band either. Thus, break-up. I still stand by that decision. Loyalty, honor & character mean a lot to me. In the beginning of 1998 I moved back home to my parents house, played lots of starcraft, Diablo and went back to school concentrating on the natural sciences.

    ยฉ๏ธ Jacob Pickard. 2026.

  • What disco did to Europe?

    Im well aware of what Disco did to the USA, that it changed the Beegee’s from a rock band to a disco staple, giving us Saturday Night fever and pee yellow polyester leisure suits.

    But ive never seen this…..