Tag: beliefs

  • BSKY to WP-JP to SS back to WP-JP journey Part 3

    When did you begin your WordPress journey, and how do you manage it day by day?

    Thank you Deepika, for the prompt!
    Feel free to use any prompts for May 2026 

    From https://justrojie.com

    Part I: ONE & Part TWO :

      Know this, a person that breaks the narrative is a threat to ideology.


    Substack: Alien Relay 3.0/Eroheretic – May of 2025 to December 25th, 2025

    First, I met a lot of great people on SS. Many i am still fond of, but when the “ss notes” became more like any other sm (in long form mind you), to me it became no better than bskye.

    2025 was also one of the hardest years of my life in a personal and on an emotional level. What follows is intimately tied with my sexual assaults, and I can not finish my story without having it be part of this prompt. I probably cried out my body weight in 2025.

    Some on SS found me being vocal and speaking out a threat to the narrative, but I was not trying to be a threat or equate male sexual assault of woman to female sexual assault on men. I was just coming out to tell my story, so other men, don’t have to suffer in silence, and maybe get a little help in a mental health & criminal system that ignores or excludes male sa victims based on biology & conditioned behaviors.

    Because for a lot of men, it ends in suicide.

    Since my background is in science i decided to do some research on sexual assault of males, commited by females.

    All I found was two studies!

    Woman have every right to demand more studies about female medical issues / I think men have this same right to demand studies on the taboo topic of sexual assault on them.

    1. 32% of men are Sexually assaulted by women every year, that’s about a little under 1/3  of the population of the US.
    2. The rate of  emotional abuse in male/female relationships is about even at ~43%.
    3. Males are expected to respond affirmatively to all female sexual advances.

    These two facts alone break the narrative we grew up with. I myself, a diehard lefty male for most of my life, till the middle of last year, was clueless and had no idea about these statistics. What I think about modern femenism? vs. What I considered feminism? – is another blog entirely, and I don’t want to get into it now.

    The first man I met who told me he was sexually assaulted, I personally was disgusted by him. It was a reaction, that as a man i was conditioned to have. The reaction was fucking surreal, me a survivor of sa, disgusted by another male sa survivor. Eventually we started talking about how we felt after being assaulted and three reactions were similar:

    1. We felt it was completely our fault.

    2. Our sense of masculinity was destroyed and had to be rebuilt ground up.

    3. We felt like we were the ones who were guilty, as if we were guilty of the assault.

    4. No one cared and there were no options for help (this being the worst of them).

    Earlier on SS probably June, I did come out about my assaults, most people and woman had so much grace, they empathized with me, gave me hope at a time when I was at my lowest. Still I didn’t think I was allowed to call myself a victim. Until I met a woman named Michelle, who said, I was a “survivor.”

        This changed my life, only then I felt I was able, allowed, to TAKE the “victim” label (it’s not given to adult men who survive, we have to take it.) There was a lot of back and forth in my mind, sometimes it was the “all women” guilt game , other times i was a rage filled aggreived victim, and the most difficult, “There was no way I could identify as a male feminist anymore”, i had to kill that part of myself to move forward. It was a core part of my identity since at least 16, it was as if i ripped out a part of my soul. I felt betrayed by femenism, the left, and Democrats. I also realized that I had deep ingrained misandry in my mind, because in 2025 I learned i was considered a villian at birth.

    “How could I be a villian, if i was victimized by a woman?”

    This filled me with rage, a deep ingrained rage, that was tearing me apart. I got really dark, considered taking myself off the list, dark hopeless days they were. Then I wrote this:    Mirror

    One of the worst things ive ever written, but it had to be done or there was the alternative.


    Yes, there’s a manosphere, but there’s also a femosphere too.  From the MAGA right i was a pathetic simp that should be killed or i should kill myself, this is to be expected, not surprised, but it still didn’t sit right.

    The worst however came from the left:

    1. Told I was still privileged, and being assaulted was probably not as bad as I say.

    2. It’s patriarchy’s fault & the assaulters internal misogyny made them do it.

    3. Numerous times I was told I should be objectified more and be raped multiple times.  That any woman empathizing with me, was wrong and I was manipulating them.

    4. I was stalked, the last time at the end of November and into December on my notes and published works, again i was attacked for explaining the statistics and saying that “anyone who is assaulted, regardless of sex, should be treated equally.” Apparently for some; I was to be punished for the sins of other men.

    At least the right is honest in their hatred that I should die, the left was all about punishment & revenge.

    I was done, SS with notes became a lot like Blueskye, becoming full of horrible people (Also before SS got popular with writers it was a favorite platform for neo-nazi’s and white supremacists, racist, bigots,  and trans-hating femenists.). I left Christmas day. Here is a link, a goodbye & reasons, my:  SwanSong

    I decided to come back to WP-JP. It’s Nice and slow, no doom scrolling for likes, little drama and most of the time everyone i meet is pretty cool.

    Im mostly Isolated on my island. If my writing is read or not, I don’t care. If others like it, i appreciate you. If people don’t like it,i still appreciate you for taking a look.

    In the end, I write for myself.


      

  • Lifetime – Dark Future Philosophical Sci-Fi

                                LIFETIME

  • Balance


    I don’t usually preface my prose, but I think this one is important that I explain. This peice comes at the end of a hard year plus of soul searching after acknowledging to myself that I was sexuslly assaulted. After nearly two years plus I buried it deep, but in the fall of 2024 on a cold morning while filling my car at Costco it all came back and hit me like bricks of ice. I barely made it through the day at work, but I did it somehow. All assault victims  experience the same things, but men especially white men are given very little acceptance or grace by soceity as a whole, left & right ideologies judge heavy on your worth after, or even your right to claim victimhood in a world that wants you silent. It took most of the year to consider myself a survivor.

       I guess its the times, but I have spent a very long time pondering aggreivment after being swallowed by it and spit out. The pull to hate and rage at those of the opposite sex was strong, some days it had consumed me. Too blame ALL women for the actions of a few, is absurd! I don’t want to be bitter or aggrieved, I think this poem captures the toxic cycle of aggreived victimhood. I had come to terms and this poem exposes what it is. Yours, Jake


    Why does the bar tip the other way, while trying to equate and balance both sides?
    to much weight on one pan
    the fulcrum tilts, the beam always holds, the beam always wins

    the villians are now the oppressed, the once oppressed villians

          Transmutation of suffering into bitter rage
    Alchemized survivor becomes the predator

    Spittle & spite
    Vengance so bright
    Inferior to superior
    Your Humanity now blight

    My dear organizing systems forming entwining, no boundaries of the bottomless hunger
    of self-righteous rage
    the victims, the survivors

    It doesnt matter to It who is in control, It doesnt care about justification, the thing exists.

    Hoary worm of eons crushes bones,  devours flesh, pukes blood, gnashing sinew, slurps guts, sucks entrails smashed
    made into mash
    Bulbous rot, engorging the gullet, suffering inside the gaping hole, digested birthing vile gas from the fermented bile of humanities sins

    Orborus the obese worm, engorged distented on your suffering; prey-as-to-predator-to-victim-survivor-as-to-predator…as-to-victim…it’s the  sweet….

                …suffering

      sweet…..

           …sweet…….suffering

                                                      suffering



       ©️ Jacob A. Pickard. 2025.                  

  • What do I stand for or was I born against?

    What do I stand for or was I born against?

    Credit to the prompt goes to https://justrojie.com


    How do you actually define this?

       When you stand for something, that means you should be automatically against the binary inverse, unfortunately pride, arrogance, aggrieved victimhood, situational ethics (tribalism), can & will take these parts of character, twist them into unrecognizable mutants, and destroy those things once held dear into phantoms and outright frauds.

    Sign Language 7″ compilation, Allied Recordings, 1992. https://www.discogs.com/release/2586751-Various-Sign-Language

       The above are three human conditions, I stand against. I have stood against them for basically my entire life. They are reflected in most of my actions, down to where i shop (I keep it small, local or regional as possible), who I support politicaly, and personal interactions with others. I view all people as equal at birth and all should have the same opportunities.

      I question everything, even my personal philosophy, my left leaning politics, my character, my actions, what I beleive since I was young. Growing up in conflict has conditioned me into a powerful detachment, yet I am endlessly passionate when it comes to my beliefs, that “being rational”, that empathy & compassion in the end will make the case that these base human needs will win out and are more important than rage, bigotry, hate, apathy, & indifference.


    “Those who stand for nothing fall for anything.”

    Alexander Hamilton


      No doubt I am a fool; but at the end of the day, looking into the mirror, it’s far more important that I expressed my character honorably and that I stand my ground.


    ©️ Jacob Pickard.2026.